“On the midnight street
No moon and no stars
No one around to calm you down
And to soften the stings to my heart
The dream is sand in my hands
The dream becomes sand in my hands”-Morrissey, Good Looking Man About Town
“Fall seven times, stand up eight.”
-Japanese proverb
OK, folks…
First, an explanation of why I have been several months behind on writing up producer features here on 1WD (Amici, Red Car, some high-end KJ brand stuff, and several Sicily items are all in that pipeline, waiting patiently for me to get my act together). The short version of the story: I am getting divorced, and it’s an enormous time, energy, and emotion suck.
So now those of you who have been giving me crap about only posting references to my paying gigs know why I am so behind on things (I barely have enough bandwidth and energy to get the paying work in on time). I am the one who filed, so I am not looking for any pity here (and I am having far more good-to-great days than bad at that moment). Everything that has transpired on the home-front since my marriage crisis started has more-or-less showed that ending the marriage is absolutely the right thing to do, so little sleep is being lost on that front now. The kid is also doing great, so the tippy-top priority is well in-hand.
While I am not fishing for sympathy, I do want to tell you that I am deeply grateful for the enormous and touching outpouring of support that I have received about this situation, both publicly and privately, from so many of you. I will never, ever forget it, and not one sunset passes right now that I don’t list those words of encouragement near the top of my list when I review the things for which I am most grateful right now.
So I hope that you’ll understand why today I am giving you yet another pointer to more of my paying gig work (I know, I suck)…
Here are this month’s Wine.Answers.com articles for your wine-soaked reading pleasure:
Three Things That You Didn’t Know About Carinena Wine Country – Ok, you probably don’t even know two facts abuot Spain’s Carinena; but you should, because there are some nice values in old vine reds coming out of this historic, mountainous, and currently-budget-mindedly-priced region.
Wine Product Review: AlcoMate Premium Breathalyzer – I know, right? Look, I am NOT saying you should be drinking and driving; but I am saying that you ought to know your limit, and while not inexpensive, this little breathalyzer seems about as easy to use in the medium price point as any available. The upside of the AlcoMate Premium Breathalyzer is that it doesn’t need to be re-calibrated (more on that in the review).
Wine Book Review: “The Mad Crush” by Sean Cristopher Weir – Now, this is some entertaining wine-related reading. The Mad Crush (which chronicles the making of a 1995 vintage Central Coast red wine) is terse of prose, short of length, and long of entertaining storytelling.
Wine Product Review: Wine Region Art By City Prints – Wine and art more often ends up as wine and gaudily cheesy than wine and tastefully artistic. Enter these stylish wine region maps by City Prints, which come as close to artistic as wine region maps can get (I’ve still got my sample on the wall, anyway).
Cheers!
Hey Dude, glad to hear you are doing better…. Here anytime.
Thanks, bro! Much appreciated!
Sorry to hear about it, Joe. Been there, but I had no children.
Thanks, Thomas. Happily, my daughter is an amazing, smart, intuitive, and brave little girl. She is handling this extremely well, and has a lot of support.
Hey, Dude. My own parents divorced when I was young. From that, rather than simply having two parents, I ended up gaining two more parents who rock for a total of four, plus three of the coolest younger siblings anyone could hope for. While things may be tough now, they could work out for the much better in the future for you and your daughter. Take care.
Thanks, MG. I already went through the “OMG my STBXW is tearing the family apart, WTF!??!???” stage. Thankfully, I am focusing on the future and it seems bright. I still have a ridiculous amount of things in my life for which I should – and do – feel grateful every day. While I miss my daughter when she is not here with me, and while I have mixed feelings about the “hemorrhaging money” phase of things, I also **love** being on my own now; it rocks, actually! I appreciate you reinforcing the positive take. Cheers!
No need to justify. I hope this becomes a turning point in your life that opens up new possibilities and that you find new levels of strength and personal growth. No new beginnings without an ending, right?
SAHMmelier – Absolutely!
Hi Joe,
Sorry to be late to comment about this, but I just wanted you to know that you have been in my thoughts. I wanted to write something profound and comforting, and ultimately realized there is nothing I can really say to make all this easier for you. So I will just say that I respect you as a writer, and wish for the best in your personal life. While I’m sure this has not been an easy time for you, I hope things are starting to move in the right direction.
Cheers,
Gabe
Thanks, Gabe. Very kind of you!
I should ad that, while I am deeply touched by all of the support I am receiving about this, I don’t need any pity. I am the one who tapped out and said “enough of this crap” and filed. Every day since then, I have seen more evidence underscoring that it was the right decision. Example: when my STBXW moved out, she did it while I was in Sicily; which is fine in and of itself, except that she didn’t tell me, so I had zero time to plan, no furniture on the way, no bed to sleep in, no food to serve my daughter when it was time for her to stay with me as per the custody agreement, etc. I wish that I could say that we’re parting amicably, having grown apart or some such other explanation, but the truth is that the way she moved out – in secret, taking whatever she wanted without discussing it with me, etc. – was a hallmark of our relationship. I’d just had enough of the hidden agendas, and the unilateral decisions that were potentially destructive to others (especially my daughter). I’ve got way too much care for my kid, and far too much self respect, to deal with that any longer. There *has* to be a better life than that for us waiting ahead.
While things may be tough now, they could work out for the much better in the future for you and your daughter. You can also get hep from this website http://www.kidsafterseparation.com
Thanks! It’s already working out better for us, especially for me since the ex is out of the house. I’ve been fortunate enough to have received a ton of support, and as one person told me “your ex is a train wreck.” Best to get away from the wreckage site. :)